


For You, I Never Stopped Loving You

by cherrylng



Category: Ayabie (Band), BVCCI HAYNES, Jrock
Genre: Angst, Boys Kissing, Confessions, Fluff, Gentle Kissing, Happy Ending, Love Confessions, M/M, Mutual Pining
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-09-08
Updated: 2019-09-08
Packaged: 2020-10-12 14:17:24
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,475
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/20565749
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/cherrylng/pseuds/cherrylng
Summary: If Aoi had heard even half a year ago that Ayabie is going to be reunited and make an album together for the first time in nine years, he would have been at best cautiously hopeful about it as that was but an expectation that was not given much thought or hope to anticipate for. One simple mistake from Kenzo’s tweet post later, now here they are in the studio after the fifteenth anniversary tour ended, the band reunited for real and making a new album. And with it, comes unresolved feelings between him and Kenzo.“It’s a beautiful song,” Aoi noted. “Yumehito would’ve sung it.”“Yumehito would’ve sung it,” Kenzo agreed as well. Then he looks at Aoi face to face, eyes soft and emotions bared open for him to see. “But I made this song with your voice in mind.”





	For You, I Never Stopped Loving You

It was hard enough to believe that they are able to reunite once a year to do one-man shows together since their tenth year anniversary.   
  
_For the sake of the fans_, is what they have said to one another when they had first reunited as a five-man band seven years ago for one night. Aoi had thought at first that the tenth anniversary show is going to be an awkward show to get through just like the first reunion, as they started talking to each other again for the first time in years.   
  
When they did it, however, it felt like they have played shows dozens of times together in a year instead of having been apart for years.   
  
And then slowly, over the next few years, it all added up and helped to mend broken bridges. Meeting up with his old bandmates on separate occasions to do events or shows or just to hang out. Yumehito composing songs with him for his solo album release. More Ayabie shows planned.  
  
Before Aoi knew it, he was in a meeting with his former bandmates, sharing talks about not just doing a fifteenth year anniversary tour as Ayabie, but also reuniting the band and make a new album.   
  
If he had heard of this even half a year ago, he would have been at best cautiously hopeful about it as that was but an expectation that was not given much thought or hope to anticipate for.   
  
One simple mistake from Kenzo’s tweet post later, now here they are in the studio after the fifteenth anniversary tour ended. The band is back together for real this time and all five of them recording music together for the first time in nine years.   
  
Things are different now and they are determined that it is going to be different. As individuals, they have learned new skills and gained different experiences over the years that will contribute to the band as a whole. They know better now, they have learned their mistakes from the past and taken their lessons from it and now they can do better as an independent band.  
  
Despite all the talk about things being different and whatnot, some things have not changed. When Aoi steps into the recording studio, greeting his bandmates, go to listen to the demo tracks, figure out the right lyrics to match the songs and record his vocals, it feels just like the old days.  
  
There are other things that reminded him of the old days. He can see Yumehito playing video games or drawing for their merchandise during his free time. Intetsu doing things at his own calm pace. Takehito doing take after take until he is satisfied with his recording. Kenzo playing his drums a little too loudly at times that his takes require a do over at a lower volume.  
  
Yet at the same time, there are signs that reminded Aoi that so many things have changed that it would require him to get a paper and pen to list them all down. One of the most obvious is song contribution.   
  
Of the nine songs that they have selected to record for the album, Kenzo has the most songs to contribute. More than Intetsu and Yumehito, who were once the main composers after Ryohei left the band.  
  
Some of Kenzo’s songs are also the most difficult to write lyrics for, mainly because there are already lyrics that came with it, written by the drummer himself. Unlike Intetsu and Yumehito who gave Aoi free reign to write what he wants, Kenzo has specific ideas of what he wants in his songs, so Aoi has to sit down with the drummer to work out on not only making the lyrics work, but also to match what are the mental pictures that Kenzo has for the songs.  
  
It is a good challenge to take in figuring out what he can add in without affecting the original messages that Kenzo wants to convey. It took a lot more time and effort than Aoi had anticipated and by the time evening comes in, he and Kenzo are still working on finding the finishing touches of the songs. They let the other three to go have dinner first, as the singer and drummer would not leave their seats until they have finished what they have started.   
  
Several scrunched up papers later, Aoi sighs in relief at completing the lyrics, letting Kenzo read it over.   
  
“Are you satisfied with it, Kenzo?” Aoi asked. “It’s still keeping to the original meaning of the song, I think.”  
  
“It’s even better than what I’ve written,” Kenzo answered, putting the papers down. “As I thought, I don’t have the same level of your flair for writing lyrics,” he says with a grin.  
  
“Don’t underestimate yourself, I’ve listened to your stuff before,” Aoi chided him, grinning back. “You’ve made leaps and bounds for being able to write something this good. You just needed some help in finishing some of these lyrics out.”  
  
What Aoi said to the drummer are honest words. Kenzo, in his opinion, has become a respectable artist in his own right and is currently the band’s own sound producer. Aoi finds it admirable to see how the drummer had grown and spread his wings.  
  
“The songs that I’ve created for GREMLINS and BVCCI HAYNES were easier than these. At least those songs were quicker to be made and released for they were meant to be for those projects.”  
  
“You have a point,” Aoi conceded.  
  
“Some of them aren’t new songs. Like this song, I actually composed it a few years ago, before I left the band,” Kenzo says, pointing to the song titled ‘Anata ni’.  
  
“Why wasn’t it made and released back then?” Aoi asks.  
  
“It felt like an Ayabie song.” _A song with all five of us in it_, is what Kenzo did not add in but the unspoken message is there for Aoi to see. And he understood it. There were a few songs that he was composing with Yumehito a year ago that could not fit into his solo album. They were good songs, but they both knew that it was meant for a better home. And that home is Ayabie.  
  
“It’s a beautiful song,” Aoi noted. “Yumehito would’ve sung it.”  
  
“Yumehito would’ve sung it,” Kenzo agreed as well. Then he looks at Aoi face to face, eyes soft and emotions bared open for him to see. “But I made this song with your voice in mind.”  
  
Aoi holds back his breath, now regretting that he refused to go out to dinner with his bandmates earlier. This had been one of his worries of being alone with Kenzo. But at the same time, a part of him had anticipated for this.   
  
The two of them have danced around each other for as long as the singer can remember. When they went their separate ways, there was a time when they did not speak to each other for years and it was not until Aoi accidentally sent an empty tweet message to Kenzo that they regained contact.  
  
They have grown and aged while being apart. Even then, however, Aoi can see that Kenzo is still handsome. Actually, at this age and his current appearance, he is now more handsome and attractive than in the past.  
  
“Did you missed me?” Aoi asked. It is a risky question, as Kenzo can give a diplomatic answer by claiming that he missed the whole band back together instead. But he wanted to know. He wanted to be sure.  
  
“I did,” Kenzo answered. “I’ve missed you for a long time,” he says quietly.  
  
Aoi tries not to show it, but a part of himself felt thrilled to know that Kenzo does miss him, that the feeling is mutual before reality came in to give him a reminder that they have still spent a longer time apart than being together in a band.  
  
“I’d thought you’ve moved on,” he says instead.  
  
It was not as if Aoi cared about who Kenzo went out with. They are both grown men. But every now and then, through the grapevine, he does hear about it. Of Kenzo dating men with brunette-dyed hair or having cute dimpled smiles or have a warm and gentle personality.   
  
“I did. Well, I’ve tried,” Kenzo reiterated himself, looking away and scratching the back of his head before he dared to look back at Aoi. “I’ve heard that you did too.”  
  
“I did,” Aoi concurred. “But they didn’t last long,” he admitted.  
  
It was not as if Aoi himself did not try to move on as well. The men that he had met and dated were fine men, but it did not work out for long and he parted ways with them amicably. When asked about it, however, Aoi would vehemently denied that his type of men have a vague resemblance to Kenzo.  
  
Kenzo nodded in understanding. The two of them are on the same boat in their dating lives.  
  
“Do you remember what happened at my birthday party event? From three years ago?” Kenzo suddenly asked.  
  
It took a few seconds before Aoi was able to answer.  
  
“I remember it, since I did attend it.”  
  
“You remembered what we did, didn’t you?” Kenzo continued.   
  
“Depends on what you’re specifically asking me to remember,” Aoi answered cryptically.  
  
Even though it was three years ago and there are parts that Aoi can no longer remember from that party event, he remembers enough that there are a lot of things that Kenzo might be referring to. Unless he was referring to _that_ incident.  
  
“We hung out at the DJ podium, had fun and lots of drinks. And then I pulled you into a dark corner when no one was looking and we kissed.”  
  
Aoi remembers it, alright. They kissed for a while, with tongue involved and there was a sense of urgency at it. Aoi allowed it to keep going until he suddenly became aware of a pair of hands started sliding down to his trousers. What Aoi did back then was to pull away, apologised, and went back to the party, seeing that Kenzo was clearly drunk.  
  
“I remembered it. You were drunk. I didn’t want to continue because I didn’t want to take advantage of you.”  
  
“You were drunk too,” Kenzo pointed out. “And in case you should know, I was the one taking advantage of you.”  
  
“Yeah,” Aoi sighed. “But I didn’t want us to do something that we would both regret.”  
  
Taking a stab of courage, Kenzo puts his hand on Aoi’s.  
  
“I don’t blame you for doing that, if you wanted to know,” Kenzo said with a calm voice and giving Aoi’s hand a squeeze. “I sort of understood why you did it and now I finally got an answer from you.”  
  
Seeing that they are in a studio room together after everything that had happened was enough of an indication to see that Aoi had made the right decision back then.  
  
“It’s not too late for us yet, is it?” Aoi asks quietly. Kenzo’s hand is warm and the singer felt the urge of wanting to lace his fingers with Kenzo’s.  
  
“We’re still here,” Kenzo answered. “And I still want a chance with you, Aoi, if you want it.”  
  
Without thinking, Aoi pulls his other hand up and touched Kenzo’s face, palm resting against his cheek. Kenzo gives a warm smile before he turns his face just enough to kiss his hand.   
  
Taking that as an answer, Aoi leans towards Kenzo, closing his eyes when their lips met. It was not like at the birthday party event from years ago, when he could taste and smell the alcohol, and feel the desperation coming from Kenzo. This time it is different. It was soft and slow, with no sense of urgency or push for more. Aoi can smell Kenzo’s cologne and there is a warm feeling within him that this is finally happening after what they have been through.   
  
“Oh my god, they’re really kissing!”  
  
The singer and drummer quickly separated in a panic, turning to the source of the voice and are shocked to see that their bandmates are back and are standing by the door.  
  
“Take-kun, it was a romantic sight, wasn’t it?” Intetsu asked in his usual calm tone with a smile on his face.  
  
“Well, it was a damn sight better than the dramas that I’ve watched,” Takehito replied.  
  
“How long have you guys been there watching us?” Kenzo asks. He did not notice that he is still holding Aoi’s hand or that he is using his own body to act as a shield for Aoi, but Aoi did.  
  
“We were about to come in here until we saw you started holding Aoi’s hand,” Intetsu said. “And, well… the two of you were so focused on each other that we didn’t want to ruin the moment,” he says with a grin.  
  
“Until Yumehito ruined it,” Takehito said.  
  
“Sorry. I didn’t think that the two of you are really still—” Yumehito makes some hand gestures excitedly, unable to find the words to describe what he feels towards this. “—I didn’t take you as a romantic for Ao-chan there, Zokkun!”  
  
“You guys don’t have anything against us for this?” Kenzo asks, wary.  
  
“We’re all adults here, Kenzo,” Takehito answered, shrugging. He gives a smirk at the couple. “It’s not like the band hasn’t been through worse. From what we saw, it looks like this was something that was a long time coming, so I’m sure the two of you will figure out how to make it work.”  
  
“If the two of you are dating, Ao-chan, Zokkun, I approve it!” Yumehito exclaimed, giving them a thumbs up.   
  
“We could’ve let you two go out and have dinner together, but we already brought back takeaway for you,” Intetsu holds up a paper bag containing said takeaway food, giving an apologetic look.  
  
“How about we finish the album first before thinking about going out?” Aoi said with a laugh, feeling a sense of relief and joy washing over him that things are going to be alright. Beside him, Kenzo is smiling as well and gives his hand another good squeeze.  
  
As the rest of the band get back to work on their respective duties, they left the two of them alone to have some privacy and their long awaited dinner. Sitting across each other on a small table having takeaway chinese food, legs touching, it already feels like an impromptu dinner date.   
  
When they finished dinner to return back to the studio, Kenzo held his hand again, this time their fingers are interlocked into a lace. For the first time in nine years, Aoi has hope and belief that they are taking the first steps towards the right direction together.


End file.
